Monday, July 28, 2014

Follow Up

Simplicity asked me if this experience with Craig wasn’t as positive as the one with T; I guess my relating of the events Saturday night came through a little flat. In fact (as I told her) that is probably the best way to put it; through no fault of Craig’s, and though there was nothing wrong with the experience and I’m glad I did it, I didn’t feel the same buoyant elation afterwards that I felt with T. In fact, it honestly didn’t leave me feeling as high as my experience last year with Brent despite the fact that he didn’t end up coming.

I’m not really sure why this was the case, though. I don’t feel any guilt or disgust at all; again, I’m happy I went through with it, and Craig is a good guy who I’d like to maintain a friendship with. Maybe it’s because it’s not as novel now; or maybe because the urge wasn’t as overwhelming as it had been the other times.

Whatever the reason, Saturday night on the way home I felt really blah about it. Again, not that there was anything wrong with the experience, but I honestly felt like it might be the last time I’d bother with any of that; not just with Craig but with anyone. By Sunday morning, when I was writing part one of the encounter, the excitement part of it was back somewhat and was also there when I wrote part two later that evening. That might not have come through in the writing because I was still thinking about it but wasn’t ready to write about that part of it.

As for today, I’m not ready to say I’m back in the full swing of things; as has always been the case, the urge is sometimes very strong, and sometimes hardly there. I’m probably just at a natural stage of not feeling that urge very strongly for now and need to lay off it until it comes back.

Sunday, July 27, 2014

Craig's List Finally Cums Through! - Part Two

I certainly monopolized the conversation Friday night, but not so much that I didn't learn a few things about Craig. He had grown up in the area (in fact, in the same part of the county that S was from) and had come out as bi when he was 15. I thought that was pretty brave for any 15 year old, but especially so for someone who grew up in that area. He said he didn't have much trouble from anyone and I could see why; they're brought up corn fed in that area, and he's not a small guy.

He moved to Georgia and worked there for a while, saying he was making great money in a management position that he couldn't stand. He started taking some courses in Psychology and fell in love with it, and just recently decided to move back to the area and concentrate on finishing his degree full time.

Craig is a little taller than I am (he's 6' 2", maybe a little taller, to my 6' 1") and quite large, but carries himself with the kind of swagger I could only dream of having. He looks like the kind of guy you don't want to pick a fight with, but you'd want him on your side if a fight was going to break out. I'm not going to say he intimidated me any, but if you wanted to say it I probably wouldn't argue it much.

Saturday morning the wife and I went about our normal chores, including going to see my parents, and even went for a nice ride on the motorcycle. I was on a low hum of excitement all day, waiting for the wife to confirm what time she'd be leaving for the game so I could let Craig know when I'd be over. I mowed and did some other yard work (without a shirt on, so I got a bit of a burn) then had a cigar while reading.

The closer it got time for the wife to leave, the more I started having second thoughts, and I considered telling him I wouldn't be able to make it. The wife left just as I was getting in the shower, and when I finished I was still right on the brink of calling it off. I picked up my phone and stared at it for a few minutes trying to decide what I was going to send; finally I texted "The wife just left. I can head over whenever you want."

He responded back asking if I wanted to walk in and find him nude on his bed, and that really caught me off guard. Did I? No, not really; it just felt too... I don't know. Finally I just responded "IDK, I'd feel pretty overdressed that way, lol." He sent back (predictably enough) "Then you'll just have to get undressed and join me! I figure that will take care of the initial nervousness." After a few back and forth exchanges, him saying he wanted me to say definitively one way or another whether I wanted him nude or not, I finally said that nude would be fine. I mean, it was going to be awkward for me either way, so fuck it, right?

It took about 20 minutes to get there, and the whole time I waffled on whether or not I wanted to do this. I mean, I certainly did, in one way. But in another way I just wanted to forget it, go back home and get drunk. This didn't really have anything to do with Craig; like I said, after Friday night's meeting I felt comfortable enough about him. I guess it was really more about not being comfortable with myself.

Finally, I arrived and parked in the curve of the cul-de-sac, behind his car, and texted him that I'd just pulled up. I had to walk in front of the house to get around the side to his basement entrance and felt certain that everyone in the house (a good friend of his, her husband or boyfriend or whatever, and a small child that I assume was her son) and probably everyone in the neighborhood was looking out their windows watching me, knowing what I was there for.

I walked in and, sure enough, there he was; large, proud, and naked. Just as I instinctively started running my "embarrassed and awkward" sub-routine, I realized that he was right; him being naked did kind of make me less nervous. I took off my clothes, sat on the edge of the bed beside him, and started stroking him. We talked, of course, but it wasn't anything worth recounting here; just small talk.

I sucked him for some time, and the harder he got the more difficult it was to get past that thick part in the middle. I could do it, but it took some effort and I couldn't really take him as deep as I'd like to have. I got him to take a short video of me blowing him which I won't be showing here because it shows too much identifying features of my face. We didn't get any pictures, but I'm experimenting with a video editing app to see if I can get some screen captures. Maybe I'll leave that as a "by request" option though.

Anyway, he wanted to suck my cock next, so I rolled over and let him go at it. Eventually we got into a 69 position, but really I wasn't that interested in what he was doing to me. He caught on and just laid back and let me do my thing, helping here and there when my jaw needed a break. (He's fucking thick!) At one point I was on my hands and knees to be in a position where I could get a better angle (and take him deeper.) Craig calls himself a "power top", so I guess it's not too surprising that he said "You know, as long as you're in the doggy position..." I stopped to look at him and say "Uh... no!" He chuckled and said "Right. We're definitely sticking with the oral only, then."

Finally I found some combination of mouth and hand that got him moaning. A minute or so later he tensed up and I felt his cock throbbing, and he came. Much like with T, I was wondering if anything had happened; it really just didn't feel or taste anything like my own. There was a little more taste involved than with T, but not a lot more.

I lay back and we talked a bit. He asked if he was going to get my load (yea, his actual words) and I thought about how to answer that. After a minute or so he raised up and looked at me, and said "Quit trying to find the way to say what you want without really saying it, and just tell me what you want!" I nodded and said that I really didn't want to at the moment. I said if we got together again maybe I would, but not this time. He said he understood, and we continued talking about other things while we got dressed.

Craig's List Finally Cums Through! - Part One

Happy Sunday, everyone. It was a pretty big weekend, so let me get on into it. This is part one of two parts, concerning the lead-up to Friday night. I'll try to get part two up later tonight, detailing Saturday (and filling in the rest of the weekend, which will serve as my weekend update.)

Last Wednesday I was doing my usual morning pre-work routine; getting the computer up, checking email, using my phone to look at Reddit and other naughty things, etc. I decided to check Craig's List just in the off chance that there might be something work responding to. As it happens, there was.

First of all, the picture of his dick that he put in his ad caught my attention. (Posted with his permission; he knows I have a blog but I haven't told him where it is.)

Now I'm not turned on by dicks like I am by pussy and tits, as I've explained before, and it's not that this one got me all hot and bothered, but come on! How can you not want to read the ad that's associated with that?! And the ad hit all the right notes for me, so I responded with a little bit about me (married, curious, might be interested, etc.) and included one of my many dick pictures.

Now at first I was a little put off by his responses; they were curt and abrupt, and he quickly wanted a face picture. It's not that I minded sending one, I just was looking for a little more discussion I guess. I almost dropped it there, and even wrote an email to James asking him his advice on it (and of course he came through as usual.) The long and short of that was after the guy and I exchanged face pictures, the conversation picked up and I started feeling more at ease.

Thursday we continued talking, now via text, and decided to get together Friday night for a meet and greet at a local establishment. He agreed that it would be meet and greet only for this first time, though he said many times how horny he was and couldn't wait until we were naked together. I got the feeling that he was trying to turn me on with compliments and sexy talk (like how I hope to turn on a woman I want to get with) but it really just made me feel a little uncomfortable. I just want to suck your cock, dude, not be seduced!

But in all other respects, he seemed like the kind of guy that I can be friends with; intelligent, good sense of humor (or at least could laugh at my jokes), well spoken. By Friday, as we continued the conversation, I knew that unless he really screwed up the meeting that night, this would probably be a comfortable situation. (And I think he picked up on my discomfort because, without me saying anything about it, he did back off from that.)

My big concern came after I sent the above picture to Simplicity and she mentioned how thick he looked. I really didn't think he was all that thick from the picture, but I must have gotten the perspective wrong. I asked him how thick he was at the widest and he said "Like, 6.5 inches." Oh, fuck. Well, one step at a time, right?

We met out in the parking lot of the establishment about 6:30 (the wife was at a game, of course) and went inside. The trick is finding a place that's not so loud that you can't have a comfortable conversation, but not so quiet that your conversation carries to everyone. We got a table a little ways away from the other groups, and the volume level seemed about right. Still, I just had the paranoid feeling that everyone looking at us knew exactly what we were up to!

Craig (we'll call him that because I met him on Craig's List) had already told me he's been with women before but is definitely gay. Honestly I was a little worried that he'd be effeminate (even though he's a bigger guy), kind of like Cam on Modern Family. Fortunately he wasn't, and I don't think most people would really know he's gay unless he told them (or, you know, grabbed some guys junk and kissed him.)

(No, he didn't do that to me.)

(Until later.)

Anyway, we ordered a pitcher and some nachos and started talking. Well, mostly I talked for the next two hours and he listened. I just meant to give a little more background on me, but one thing led to another and I wound up telling him all about the L, B and S drama over the past three years. I didn't tell him about L's and my shenanigans (though I came close a couple of times) but he was enthralled by the story. Near the end of it he asked who L was with now, and I told him she's with B and will definitely not be going back to S. He asked how I could possibly know that and his jaw dropped when I told him that S had killed himself last October. After a bit of stunned silence he said "You know how to tell a hell of a story!"

I also told him about my past experiences with Brent from last year and T a few weeks ago (it turns out he knows T!) and really tried to emphasize how each time I froze up when it came to the time to do anything. By then he'd paid up our bill and we'd moved outside to the parking lot, and it was getting close to my cut off time to be comfortably on the way home before the wife left the game. I had a cover story for being out (meeting some guys from work) but didn't want to be coming in later than her. I told Craig that I felt comfortable and I thought that, if he agreed (he did), that we could get together Saturday or Sunday while the wife was at another game.

He asked if I wanted to follow him home (assuring me he understood that nothing would happen) just so I'd know how to get there. I'd been thinking along the same lines, and because he said he was only about five minutes away, I figured I'd have time to get there and still get home within my margin of error. As we went through the twists and turns to get to his place (he's renting the downstairs apartment of a friend of his house in a really nice neighborhood) the beer I drank started calling for attention, so when we got there I asked if I could use his bathroom.

As I took care of business I read an email from Simplicity asking how things had gone. I quickly responded that nothing was going to tonight but that we were going to meet up probably the next day. I finished up, washed my hands and went back into his room. I'd thought about asking to see his dick, or asking if he'd want to see mine, but once again I was frozen and just couldn't make that move. (I've really got to work on that.) So I stood awkwardly, hemming and hawing while we made small talk, and finally said "well, I guess I should probably be going." He laughed and said okay, and that he'd walk with me to my car.

As we stepped outside the basement entrance, which is kind of hidden from the rest of the neighborhood (it was at the end of a cul-de-sac), he said "Stop a minute." I did and turned towards him and he stepped closer, and I thought he was going to try to kiss me. He'd asked in our text exchanges about kissing, and I said it wasn't something that turned me on (with guys, anyway) but it didn't gross me out either and if he wanted to that would be fine. He didn't kiss me (I don't know if I was more relieved or disappointed), but he stood close and reach down to fondle me through my pants. I knew I wasn't presenting much at that time (I'd told him I'm a grower, not a show-er) but I could feel myself starting to respond. I reached over and fondled him as well, and though he didn't have a hard-on either I could tell he was getting there.

I mentioned that I had thought to ask if he wanted to see my dick and he immediately pulled me back into the house and to his room. I started to freeze up again when he asked if I wanted to see him, and I said yes, so he unzipped and pulled his shorts and underwear down. That broke the ice so I unzipped and pulled myself out as well. We stood closer and stroked each other for a few seconds before I said "Ah, hell, I better try it out a little while we're here, right?" He sat down on his bed and lay back while I kneeled there and licked his shaft and then took it into my mouth.

Again, he wasn't fully erect at this time so it didn't seem to difficult to get around that swell in the middle. He moaned and groaned while I sucked him, and he was starting to grow a bit more. I wanted to continue, but it really was getting late so I stopped and told him that would have to do for now. I stood up in front of him as he sat up on the bed, and he grabbed me and pulled me towards him. He said something about wanting a taste too, and took me into his mouth. It felt good and I was starting to respond, but the clock was ticking in the back of my head. After about a minute he stopped and I zipped back up.

We walked out to my car (he had me stop again to fondle me some more) and talked a few more minutes, solidifying the plans for the next day. I did warn him that it entirely depended on the weather, and whether or not the wife went to the game. She almost certainly would if they were playing, but it has happened on the rare occasion before that she would decide at the last minute to stay home and spend time with me.

Monday, July 21, 2014

Weekend Update

By Friday, it looked like my weekend was shaping up to be okay, but nothing special or blog-worthy. Then things sort of just fell into place and it turned out to be pretty good after all! No sexual shenanigans ensued (it’s not shenanigans if it’s with the wife, right?) but I did get to be a little sneaky.

During the week I’d planned a cookout with the niece and, later, her little half-sister. The niece has been getting along well enough in her new apartment, and we’ve gone over to see her a few times, but haven’t really had the chance to hang out for a while.

Thursday L said she was going to be in the area with her daughter and I suggested they come over for burgers if they had time. She initially said they probably would, but almost immediately started back-tracking and saying that she didn’t know how long she and the daughter would be doing what they needed to do, and then with the father-in-law, so she couldn’t say what time they’d be there. Later she said they might not have enough time, and if they came by it would be short and sweet to say “hey” and then getting right back on the road.

I told her it was fine, and not to stress herself over it; if they could make it fine, and if not then we’d catch up later on. That seemed to calm her down (she really did seem to be stressing over what to her probably seemed like another obligation) and we didn’t really talk about it anymore on Friday. I didn’t hear from her Saturday morning, so I just assumed they would get caught up and not have time to come by. (L doesn’t like making the long drive back to her town when it’s dark, because of the winding road she has to take to get there.)

The wife had to work Saturday morning, which meant we both woke up early. I did some shopping to get things for the cookout, and when she got home at 10 we did our other chores. Because of the planned cookout, the wife had decided she wasn’t going to the game that night, but wanted to go to see the teams batting practice and try to get some autographs she still needs. (I use the word “need” loosely here.)

About 1:30 L called and said they were at the father-in-law’s house trying to install a new printer but couldn’t get it to work. I know better than to try to talk her through trouble-shooting anything over the phone (she just doesn’t have the patience for it and I don’t have the patience for people who get cranky when I’m trying to help) so I offered to come over and try to get it to work. She said yes, and the wife decided to go with me instead of to batting practice. I told her it was up to her, and she was welcome to go, but that I wouldn’t mind if she went to the ball park either. She said she’d go because she wanted to see L and didn’t think they’d stay for dinner if they came by at all.

We got to J’s and, long story short, I determined that the new printer was bad and would need to be replaced. L offered to take it back but J said he’d wait until B came in and they’d do it together. L offered several times, and I even said I could take him later this week if B can’t make it down, but J said no outright to L and “we’ll see” to me. On our way out I asked L if they were going to come over and she said yes, and that they’d stay to eat because they were starving.

Once we got to the house, I started working on getting dinner together and the wife, L and L’s daughter ran out to pick up some more things (after having some snacks to hold them over until the burgers and hotdogs were ready.) They came back and then the other two nieces showed up just as I was getting the food off the grill, and the party really started!

Then stopped about 20 minutes later. The niece got a migraine and didn’t feel good; she tried to hang in for a while, but it just got to be too much for her. I offered to let the younger niece (her sister) stay and we’d take her home later, but she decided she’d go with her sister because she had some packing to do. Soon after they left, L and S had to get on the road (it was just before 6 and L still wanted to be home before it started getting too dark), so the wife decided to go on to the game after all since it would just be getting started. I might normally have been disappointed, but we’d had a good time, and now I could enjoy some time to myself with a cigar and a good book.

When the wife got home later, we had a few drinks then went to bed. She hinted that we could fool around a little, but we were both too tired from the long day.  I fought to stay awake long enough for her to fall asleep first so my snoring wouldn’t bother her, but I couldn’t have been awake more than five minutes after my head hit the pillow.

I woke the wife the next morning and we had a nice breakfast using some of the leftovers. (I heated up a hamburger patty, melted some cheese on it, put some chili from the hotdogs on that, then topped it with a fried egg. I ate mine with the last burger bun and the wife had hers on a slice of toast.) I was cleaning up in the kitchen after when the wife came up to me and started kissing and cuddling. Before long we were naked and she was “dragging” me to the bedroom by my cock!

She gave me a fantastic blowjob but wouldn’t let me go down on her, saying she needed a shower. I didn’t argue, because she also said that, since she needed a shower, I could “get messy.” That means that when I’m ready to cum, I can pull out and “fire at will” (though Will wasn’t there) and hit her wherever it landed! That’s my favorite thing! I wound up leaving a nice long splatter from her pussy up to her shoulder, and though she got grazed on the cheek, most of that shot landed on the pillow. Well, it was time to change the sheets on the bed anyway, lol.

The wife decided she would go to batting practice after we had lunch and stay on through the game which started at 4. I didn’t really want to be stuck at home all day by myself, so I was just thinking about sneaking out to see a movie (not that I needed to “sneak” out, but I didn’t want the wife to change her mind and decide to go with me) when L texted me, asking what I was doing. I told her what I was thinking, and she said if she wasn’t so far she’d go with. I have to admit that, though I knew nothing like that would happen (probably) I did start having a little movie running through my mind of being in a dark theater with L, sitting all the way in the back, at a movie neither of us really cared about.

I told her she should come on anyway, and I’d pay for her gas. I figured she’d immediately say “no” and that she had too much to do, but after 10 minutes of no reply I started getting my hopes up that she actually would. When she did text back, it was to say that she really didn’t want to do anymore long driving for the weekend. I suggested I could drive down there and we could see something in one of their theaters, and she started looking. She mentioned some movies that would start at 1, but I told her I wouldn’t be able to leave until the wife did, and that I didn’t want to tell her I was going because she would want to go with. L said that was what she was thinking too, because (as she put it) “I want to spend some time with my big brother without someone constantly chattering about work or baseball or whatever!”

Finally L said that any of the later movies would be too late for her because she would still need to get dinner ready (among other chores.) It would have also been cutting it close for me, assuming the wife would be home around 7, because it’s almost 1 ½ hours from my house to L’s. A movie ending at 5 or so, then getting her back home… it just would have been a really tight fit for the schedule. L said we could just hang out, though, and do a movie another time, and I agreed.

So the wife and I had lunch (fish tacos with my homemade slaw again) and I told her I was going to my old office to work on some server settings (something I do from time to time anyway.) She had a day of baseball planned, so she really didn’t care what I did as long as it didn’t sound like too much fun.

I met L at the local Wal-Mart in her town and walked with her while she picked up things for that night’s dinner. Despite the past few months distance, once we were together it was like old times (minus most of the shenanigans.) We teased and picked at each other like brothers and sisters do, and laughed about stupid shit like we always do. It was so much more comfortable being just the two of us.

She leaned down to get something from a low shelf, which caused the front of her shirt to fall away in a very interesting way. She saw me looking and grinned; I grinned back and said “I love that shirt!” She laughed and stayed bent over a little longer than was really necessary. Later, in another isle, she caught me looking again (though I wasn’t really trying to hide that I was looking) and when I joking apologized she said “Oh, it’s fine. I did it on purpose this time!” and winked at me.

We finished up the shopping and I followed her through town to their house and helped her bring in the groceries. We stood around for a bit, then B came out of the bedroom for a minute to say hi. (He had to work that night, so was trying to get some rest before his shift.) L and I grabbed a beer and went to sit at the picnic table out in the back yard so we wouldn’t disturb him.

We had a really good conversation, but I won’t go into all the details. It was hot at times as she talked about her and B, and I talked about the wife and me, and we talked about us together, reliving some of our favorite adventures. I showed her some pictures of the wife’s and my anniversary date (and “accidentally” showed her one of the naughty ones from later that night, eliciting a grin and a nod of approval from her) and all too soon it was time to get back on the road.

L walked me to my car and we said our goodbyes, and after a lingering hug (but keeping my hands only in appropriate places) I drove home. I finished my cigar just as the wife got home from the game (the local team lost again) so we had a quick dinner of leftovers from the day before (hotdogs this time), a couple glasses of wine, then turned in early (before 10) for the night.

So how was your weekend?

Monday, July 14, 2014

Weekend Update

Sunday was the wife’s and my 24thanniversary, and we had a pretty good weekend dedicated to just us. There were no local ballgames to distract her, and though we had other things going on, we had a nice, intimate weekend. Since it was the tail end of shark week, we didn’t get to have as much sex as I would have liked, though.

Friday night we spent a quiet evening at home after a dinner of fish tacos with home-made tangy cole slaw. It was so much simpler to make than I thought it would be, so we’ll probably eat more fish from now on.

Saturday we did our normal chores, including stopping in to visit my folks, then headed out to the city I work in. We’d thought that the wife might come have lunch with me on Monday (today) and she wanted to make sure she knew how to drive here. She was able to get us to the office with little direction from me, and from there we headed out to the mall.

We walked around what were, essentially, the same stores as are at our mall, looking to see if they had any different items. She wanted to get a little more dressed up than usual for our anniversary dinner on Sunday, and was looking for a skirt. We didn’t find one there, but she did see a coupon for a free pair of panties from Victoria’s Secret.

Until recently, the wife wouldn’t have considered getting anything from VS; Hane’s plain cotton panties and some inexpensive bra stuffed in a box at Wal-Mart was about all she ever wanted to wear. But thanks to some coupons that came in to my work, addressed to a woman who doesn’t work here anymore (and hasn’t for several years) the wife has started to see some benefits to well-made under things. Finding that coupon Saturday got her a free pair of lacy panties that she normally wouldn’t have given a second thought to, thinking they wouldn’t look good or would be too “scratchy.”

We stopped at another store on the way home and she did find a nice skirt, and a few tops to go with it. I started talking about how nice the skirt would be, especially with those lacy panties, while we were on our way to dinner the next night; how easily I would be able to fiddle around with her. I figured she’d laugh at me and tell me to forget it, but she actually seemed into the idea! When we got home, she modeled the panties for me (and to see if she’d got the right size) and they looked pretty hot on her!

I fried steaks and baked potato strings for dinner (with the rest of the tangy slaw as another side) and we decided to check out the local fair. We have it every summer, and most times I’d rather not go at all (you know me and crowds) but I was in a good mood and the wife wanted to go so off we went. We never ride the rides, but we did walk the full grounds and took in the sites. I was tempted to get a corn dog (my one weakness at the fair) but they all looked pretty unappetizing that late in the day (around 8:30 by now); instead, I got us a funnel cake to share. We didn’t need it, but that deep fried dough, powdered sugar and drizzle of fudge was hard to resist! We got through about half of it before throwing the rest away.

Sunday morning we had a big breakfast, then walked around the big, local flea market. The wife saw a really nice black Army jacket that she was able to get the seller to drop the price on, so she bought it for me. It fits, but it would fit better if I lose another 20 pounds or so. Fortunately I have another two or three months before it gets cold enough to wear it, so we’ll see what we see.

We did a little more shopping, and the wife made another trip to Victoria’s Secret with some more coupons and got another free pair of panties (same lacy style, different color) and a new bra. By the time we went out for our anniversary dinner that evening, she had on her demure skirt and blouse, but underneath that she had on sexy, lacy panties and a new, sexy bra.

We had dinner at our favorite sushi place and got the “Love Boat”, which is literally a boat-load of sushi for two (maybe more) people. After dinner we rode around, more or less at random, and to my surprise the wife let me push her skirt up, her panties aside, and play with her pussy; she was soaking wet! (That might have been as much from Germany winning the World Cup as anything I was doing.) She started getting a little paranoid after a while, though, and we decided to go home to finish up. I wanted to make it more romantic and loving, but we were both full and starting to wind down, so we got down to business and finished up pretty quick. Not long after, we’d taken care of the kids (our dogs) and were ready for bed.

So all in all we had a pretty good weekend. I hope yours was good as well.

Thursday, July 10, 2014

Waiting for Something

If you’re of a certain age (give or take) you know Colin Hay. Even if you don’t know you know him, you know him; he was the lead singer for Men at Work, the band that did such hits as “Who Can it be Now?” and “Land Down Under.” They were popular during my teens, and I guess I always thought they were alright, in a goofy, bubble-gum pop kind of way.

I don’t know much about the band, or when they broke up, and I don’t care enough to do a simple Google search to find out. Hay has had a pretty good little solo career since then, mostly acoustic performances in college towns (or so I gather.) Some of the Men at Work songs work better for me as simple acoustic songs than they ever did as full-blown electric band songs, and seem a lot deeper and more thoughtful. A good example of that is Overkill.

Here's Men at Work's version:

And here is Colin Hay performing it solo:


I haven’t listened to Hay extensively, but by far my favorite song of his is “Waiting for My Real Life to Begin.” I first heard it in an episode of Scrubs, when a patient character on the show died. The protagonist, J.D., imagined her rising from the hospital bed to tell him not to feel bad about her dying and sang the song. I liked the song then, but after finding the original on Youtube I fell in love with it. Here's Hay singing it:


It's a beautiful song, in my opinion, but it's also very sad. I hear in this song the regret of a life wasted, of someone who knows he could have done more, but for whatever reason he didn't. It reminds me of my father, and maybe of my cousin, but also it reminds me a little too much of me.

Wednesday, July 9, 2014

Just One More Thing

I can’t believe I forgot the absolute biggest highlight of all in my update. I realized it last night and almost decided it would be too embarrassing to mention it now. However, it’s too big to not tell, so here we go.

The wife flashed a truck driver - On our way to Kentucky, I once again offered the wife a deal: she flashes a truck driver and she can get a box of baseball cards. This time I upped the ante by saying she could spend up to $100 on the box. I also said she’d get a bonus (to be named later) if the trucker sounded his horn. That was the magic number, apparently!

I didn’t think she was going to, though; we passed a number of trucks that she didn’t even look twice at. But at one point while we were climbing a good hill, and no other cars were too nearby, we came up on a truck that was moving slowly. Just as we got about window level, she shifted in her seat and lifted her shirt and bra!

It was over in a flash (see what I did there?) and apparently the truck driver didn’t happen to look down at that moment, but the wife actually exposed her boobs to someone who could have seen them if they’d looked!

And that’s not all; on the way back Monday morning, I mentioned that she could still go for the bonus if she wanted. She laughed and said “no”, but asked what the bonus would have been. I told her I wasn’t sure, I’d have to think on it. Then I said “Look, you know as well as I do you would have been able to get the cards anyway, just by asking.” She agreed, knowing that I’ve let her get cards plenty of times before without requiring a flash. “I just find it really hot to think about you showing them to someone else,” I continued.

We joked around about it a bit more, then the subject dropped. About a half hour later, she said her bra was tight and asked me to open it for her. She didn’t lift it up and away like she does when we get home and she wants it opened, but it was hanging looser. I told her to show me what a trucker would see if she did flash, and she lifted her shirt up for a few seconds, giving me a good look. (Again, no cars were near enough for anybody to see.)

For the next two hours, give or take, whenever we passed a truck she’d tease me by telling me if the driver had looked down at her or not. Her excuse for why she wouldn’t flash them was because either cars were too close or we were in a flat area and we weren’t passing them quick enough. I really figured she just wasn’t going to do it at all, and was okay with that. After all, in September we’ll have a long drive to Myrtle Beach to work on it!

But in the last hour of the drive home, where we had more hills, she finally saw a chance she was willing to take. As we got closer I said I was going to toot the horn to get the driver’s attention, but she said “No!” I quickly agreed, not wanting her to let a good chance by, and as we got there she turned and lifted her shirt again.

Unfortunately, once again the driver didn’t look down. In fact, the next three truck drivers that she flashed (IKR?!)  didn’t look down! It was a little disappointing, honestly, but I have to give her credit for the attempt. She kept saying it was embarrassing, and I kept saying it was hot. In fact, I had a visible hard-on (which she wouldn’t play with, dammit) just from the fact that she’d tried!

So yes, that was the best highlight of the whole vacation, even better than the sneaky quickie we had in my niece’s room’s bathroom! (The one who wasn’t there; that’s the room we stayed in while at my sister’s.) We could hear my sister and the younger niece talking in the room next door while we did it!

Tuesday, July 8, 2014

Weekend Update (for real this time!)

Good morning, everyone! I apologize for last night’s drunken post, but apparently I should do it more often (according to some people.) There was no story behind it, as some thought; after two beers a couple more sounded like a good idea, then after those some vodka seemed like a good idea. I don’t feel terribletoday, but I am quite a bit run down.

As I (drunkenly) posted last night, we had a really good time with my sister (R) and her husband (D) and younger daughter (O). Their older daughter is in the Bahamas going through a marine science internship, so we didn’t get to see her. Somehow I think she’s okay with that trade off.

I considered writing about everything, but as much as we enjoyed our time there, I’m afraid others would find the details tedious.  So I’ll just write about the highlights, in no particular order.

*My brother-in-law’s weight loss* - D, my B-i-L, has always been thin, but as a dedicated, life-long body builder he’s never been skinny. He’s 6’1” and as recently as January was still the guy with huge arms and chest and the obligatory six-pack abs. In the past four months or so, he’s been dealing with a lawsuit brought on by a man he’s worked with. The lawsuit has no merit, but D will still wind up spending quite a bit of money to defend himself unless he pays the guy’s ridiculous demands. Because of this he’s lost 25 lbs. and looks gaunt!

*Working my ass off!* - I wish it were literally true that I’d worked my ass off, but I did work hard helping D over the weekend. Their land is some 7 acres (maybe more) and he generally hires on people to do the worst of the work. But with the legal things going on, and his business being so closely involved in the market, the past few years have been more of a struggle so he has to do most of it himself. He’s certainly capable, even after the weight loss (he’s still in better shape than I am!) I was glad to help out with clearing branches and cutting up the fallen white oak tree, among other things, but it was hard work! I’m not used to actually weighing (slightly) less at the end of vacation than when I went! D was very appreciative, because it would have taken him much longer, and been more dangerous, had he tried to do it himself.

*Towing a tractor with a Range Rover* - D’s John Deere tractor broke down in one of the lower fields and we couldn’t get it started. It just needed a new battery, but we couldn’t get the compartment opened because the bolts were frozen with rust. D didn’t want to leave the tractor down in the field because if he had to call someone to work on it, he wasn’t sure they’d be able to get their truck through the gates. So with his Range Rover, he drug 4200 lbs. of tractor uphill through the field and then their front yard for almost 300 yards. I didn’t think it would have enough ass to pull that much weight, especially up a soft field, but it did!

*Snuggling with my sister Friday night* - It was very comfortable snuggling with R, my sister, Friday night. We were all sitting out by the pool, drinking and laughing together and generally having the kind of good time D has needed to have for a while now. R is always affectionate, and more so since our oldest sister died, and when I sat beside her on the lounger and put my arm up, she just melted against me.  And no, it was in no way sexual like it would have been with L. It was just a brother and sister who in many ways went through hell together growing up sharing a moment.

*Seeing Saturn’s rings through the telescope* - D has one of those really good telescopes with all the bells and whistles, and we pulled it out Saturday because it was the first visit we’d had up there since he got it that the night was clear! We looked at the moon and at Venus, which was all fine and well, but when D finally got Saturn in the sights it was awesome! Of course I’ve seen pictures of Saturn, and I’ve seen pictures of what people see in their telescopes when they see Saturn. But I’ve never seen it for myself, live and with my own eyes, and there’s just something different about it that way.

*The Bonfire!* - What work around the land D had been able to do led to the accumulation of a lot of brush. We added to it Friday, with limbs from a pine and huge logs from the white oak that fell a few months ago. We had to cut it into four sections that the tractor could handle dragging through the field. All that together made for a hell of a bonfire! We lit it early on Friday, then added to it as we went. D used the tractor’s bulldozer attachment to re-arrange the logs and brush to keep it burning, and when we left Monday morning it was still smoldering.

*The Bonfire! (part 2)* - Sunday night R and D started talking about the financial records from the 90s they no longer needed to keep but were taking up space in the basement. D said he would take them to the shredding company the next day, but R said (maybe jokingly) that we should just take them down to the bonfire and burn them. We put some beer in the cooler, loaded up about 200 lbs. or so of paperwork in the Range Rover, and drove down to the fire. D doused everything in charcoal lighter fluid and we threw it all on the smoldering coals, which caught quickly and we had another roaring fire. We spent the next two hours or so talking and drinking, and taking turns with the pitchfork turning over the ashes to expose the paper underneath to the fire.

*The food!* - D and R both are excellent cooks (better than I am, at any rate), and love to use as much from their own garden as they can. They even grow their own herbs, like basil, marjoram, thyme, sage, etc. I tried not to eat too much, and with some success, but everything we ate was very good!

As we were saying our goodbyes and getting last hugs in Monday, D thanked us again for helping out and for helping him put all the legal crap behind him for a little while. He said he felt better and had eaten better than he had in some time.

D is 8 years older than me, so I don’t usually feel qualified to give him advice (especially since he’s also smarter than me) but I did pull him aside to tell him this: it’s a shitty situation you’re in, but you’ve got the paper trail to prove you’re in the right. Unfortunately, being right isn’t always enough and the good guys don’t always win. But the only thing he can take from you is money and things, and your life is about more than just that. It would suck, and would be a struggle, but I can tell you that R and the kids can make do without any of these things. The only thing they can’t replace, and they can’t do without, is you.

Of course we all know that, but sometimes you just have to hear it from someone else.

Monday, July 7, 2014

Weekend Update (but Not Really)

I'm exhausted.

I'm drunk.

I'm sorry.

I was planning to write about my weekend tonight, but I'm just too ready for bed right now and can't write coherently. (Example: it's taken me fifteen minute to write the above, and most if it was with one eye closed.)

We had a great weekend, with lots of things to talk about, but it won't happen tonight despite my promises to some people. I will probably be busy tomorrow catching up at work, but I will try to write my real weekend update if I get some time during the day.

Wednesday, July 2, 2014

Happy 4th!

The wife and I are going out of town tomorrow(July 3), so this has been a somewhat busy week for me, getting caught up with everything before I leave. I’d hoped to write a FFF because I like the prompt, but I just haven’t had the time to, even at home. The wife had a game to go to Monday night, but I had some errands to run and by the time I got home I was too tired to think that hard.

We’re going to see my older sister and her family, same as we did last year for the 4th of July weekend. Near the beginning of June we’d made tentative plans to go to a party on the 3rdwith L and B, and stay with them overnight, but the more I thought about it the more I wasn’t sure I wanted to. Plus, the wife was having a lot of trouble getting a group of days off all together because of her company’s stupid policies, and this looked like the only weekend we’d get to have a nice, long visit with the Kentucky clan (that’s with a C, so no klan jokes, please!)

I was a little worried that L would make a big deal out of our not coming, but when I told her early last week, she said that it was fine. We didn’t talk the rest of the day, so I don’t know if she was mad about it or had just gotten busy. The next day we talked and things seemed okay, and near the end of the week we seemed on better footing than we’d been for a while. In fact, this past weekend we had fun, joking text conversations on Saturday and Sunday. They weren’t lengthy, and certainly nothing like we’d had in the past, but it was the first time we’d had any real conversation on a weekend in a long time; it felt good.

Anyway, we’re leaving tomorrow and coming back Sunday (or perhaps Monday; we’ll see) so I probably won’t be able to post anything for the rest of the week. I’ll try to get a Joke of the Week up, scheduled for Friday publishing, but I can’t promise anything. You’ll just have to muddle through without one somehow most likely. But I will try to get a Weekend Update up sometime Monday or (most likely) Tuesday.

Have a happy 4th of July, to my American friends, and a safe, wonderful, sex-filled weekend! (To my non-American friends, I hope your 4th of July is happy as well, even if you aren’t celebrating anything.)