This Isn't About Football!

If you follow the NFL at all you’re probably aware of a recent problem with the Miami Dolphins. One player, Jonathan Martin, has accused another player, Ritchie Incognito, with bullying and racist behavior. I’m not going to get into the debate about whether Martin needs to toughen up or Incognito needs to tone it down; I’ll leave it to ESPN to blow that shit way out of proportion. Frankly, as long as it’s not the Cowboys locker room in disarray, I’ve moved from mild interest to mostly indifference about the specific issue.

One thing did catch my eye yesterday, though. A lot of the Dolphins’ players have come out in support of Incognito, and most of them say he is not racist despite his use of the “N” word in a voice mail left for Martin (who is bi-racial). And this is coming from the other Black players, one of whom said (paraphrasing) “He [Incognito] is honorary. You don’t understand because you ain’t Black, but he’s honorary. He’s more Black than Martin.”

Martin is bi-racial, from a well-to-do family, and graduated from an Ivy League college. Those factors apparently make him “less” Black than the blonde-haired, pasty skinned (except where he has tattoos) Incognito in the eyes of his teammates (and probably a fair amount of the Black population in general.) A statement like that is obviously intended to be an insult to Martin and, conversely, to be a compliment for Incognito as well as a defense. I haven’t heard anybody else mention this, but one wonders what would have been the reaction if a White player, in defense of a Black person, had said something similar.

It caught my eye because of a couple of experiences I had in the military with this kind of double standard. The first one happened in Basic Training between two of my fellow recruits (thankfully I wasn’t directly involved in this one.) I wish I could remember their names, but that’s beyond me at this point, almost 30 years later. So let’s call them Burt and Ernie.

Burt was White (I assume he still is) and Ernie was Black, and the two of them struck up a pretty good friendship early on. At least once a day Ernie could be heard calling Burt a “cracka-ass redneck”, though it was understood to be good-natured. Burt was actually from the mid-west, if I remember correctly, and didn’t really have any of the characteristics I would have associated with either a cracka-ass or redneck, but it was all in fun.

One day the two of them got into an actual argument over something, and it was apparent that their tempers were heating up. This wasn’t their typical back-and-forth banter where one would take a contrary view just to have something to do; they were honestly at odds on some idea or another and were having a heated exchange about it. It didn’t help that this argument was being played out in front of everyone in the barracks, especially since four or five of the other Black soldiers were behind Ernie, egging him on. Now this was not in any way a racial argument, or a Black versus White thing; it was probably something as banal as which college was better or the like. But every point Ernie made was underscored by screaming laughter of his peanut gallery, and Burt would get shouted down when he tried to counter.

Finally, Ernie said “What the fuck do you know? You ain’t nothing but a dumb, cracka-ass redneck!” which of course resulted in howls of laughter from the others. Burt answered “I think I know as much as a Black boy who never left home until two months ago.”

Did you cringe just now? Did you do that reflexive thing White people do when they read about a White person who said “boy” to a Black person? It’s especially bad that he used the qualifier “Black” with it, but “boy” was the over-the-line moment, wasn’t it? If you didn’t, then hey, that’s great; you’re more enlightened than most. If you did, don’t feel too bad; I cringed writing it.

Well, pandemonium ensued as can probably be expected. The four or five Black guys behind Ernie went nuts, screaming at Burt and edging closer to him. For his part, Ernie looked as surprised at their reaction as Burt, who later told me he never considered that they would take what he said as anything other than the tit-for-tat exchange that he intended it to be. But if a Drill Sergeant hadn’t come in to see what all the ruckus was about, it could have gotten bad for Burt.

As it was he got reamed for making a racist comment, and there was some talk (though probably more to scare Burt than actual intent) of kicking him out of Basic Training. Of course Ernie didn’t get in trouble for calling Burt a “cracka-ass redneck” because, you know, they’re just words and Burt should have been  mature enough not to be bothered by mere words. (For the record, Burt and Ernie remained friends. It took a few days for things to settle down, but by the end of training it was mostly forgotten about by most of us.)

The second incident was a few years later, when I was stationed in Germany, and did involve me directly. I’d gone bowling with a group of guys from my unit one night, and the beer was going down pretty easy. The good-natured insults that were a normal part of Army life were flying, and though I’m normally quieter and more reserved, that night I was giving as good as I got. I got in a number of good zingers that even the brothers were impressed by, and we all had a good time.

The next morning I was eating breakfast with some of the guys who’d been there that night. Mitchell, one of the E-3s (Private) in my crew, was telling me that one of the girls working at the alley the night before had asked him who I was. I fake-angrily berated him for not having told me the night before when I could have done something about it, which had the guys at the table laughing. The angle I was playing up was that I’m married and can’t go back over there while sober to chat the girl up, but I’d been drinking the night before and could have gotten away with it then. Not to brag (yea, right) but I had them in stitches.

When Mitchell caught his breath he said “Man, that chick was right when she said you talk shit as good as a brutha.” To put that in context, most of the guys that I’d been there with were Black, including Mitchell, and there was a lot of shit-talking going on. I laughed and said “What did she mean ‘like a brutha’? ‘Bruthas’ ain’t the only ones who can talk shit, now!” I was mainly just playing around, still in character from before, but I was genuinely confused as to why she would have put it that way.

Jones, also Black, was laughing and said “Sgt. CuriousRob, she meant that as a compliment! You should be proud!” Still in a joking mood, I said “That’s not a compliment; it’s insulting! It’s as bad as if I said you play tennis as well as a White person!”

You just cringed again, didn’t you?

Of course the point I was making, and however much I was joking I was still making a point, was lost with those at the table. Jones, who actually was a pretty good tennis player, assured me he would whip my ass on the tennis court right then and there to prove Black people can play tennis as good as Whites can, and even better! I didn’t get in any trouble over the incident, but it sure drove home the fact that the double standard exists (and that people willfully misunderstand a point if it means they can get their rage on.)